why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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