Got a toothbrush?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.