It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need moral support for this bender
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
i've created a new STD.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize