He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
