I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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