We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
