I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
