idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
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im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize