Its about making memories worth repressing
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
