he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
