we're chasing vodka with high fives
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
