I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
