maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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