I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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