HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
