I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
