I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
