You really coming over, don't trick.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
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There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
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According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Well I just put wine in my tea
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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