The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
