he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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