Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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