she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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