Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize