it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.