Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
