i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
