Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Randomize
