Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
