Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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