Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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