just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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