I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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