I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
As shirtless as possible
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Never underestimate the power of titties
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