dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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