Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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