that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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