i want to fuck
it's pretty self explanatory
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Less talking, more tequila
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.