My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo