But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Randomize
