Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
