Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
