I accidentally burped into my bong.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
either way he was missing a nipple.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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