I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
The adults are the big ones right?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
