I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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