Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
