So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize