You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
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DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
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i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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