don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
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