id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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