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• (212): View more from New York

  And mexicans. My burrito likes you.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

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• (407): View more from Florida

  sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.

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• (415): View more from California

  Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th

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• (206): View more from Washington

  you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.

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