maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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