You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
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