I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
