Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
